Sour sour, good news!

Daddy God, 

 An ex-colleague just informed me that she got hired back to the company. I'm happy for her, truly. And happy that she would share her joy with me. Such sweetness to see that Lord, You are opening doors for her. But on the other hand Lord, I wondered why they didn't consider to get me back. Am I not good enough? And the position that I got into the final round but didn't get it... all these floods of thoughts keep coming and how do I align myself to the position of being a "Child of God" even after all these setbacks?


Is it possible, Lord? That YOU are all that I'm after? 

 It ended being a day where I felt lifeless, unmotivated and not knowing what to do with my day... Even napped when I wasn't tired. 

 Then I recalled this analogy that Pastor Prince shared with us at camp last week. Life is like riding on a bus (or Grab if you prefer 😂), and you can pass by a beautiful orchard filled with sweet smelling flowers and you feel that your day is UP there and HIGH, then at a turn, it may turn towards a dump that smells of pungent unwanted mess and you feel that your day is not note-worthy... But honestly, we are in the bus. And that's how our emotions are for us. We can observe them as a spectator and not let them power over us and our decisions. 

 So today, I am reminded, emotions are real, and I'm not going to ignore them like they are foreign to me, but they shall have no influence over who I am (a favoured Child of God) and what's going on around me. 

 Thank you Jesus for your finished work. The only reason I can live above even my thoughts and emotions because You have given me better!

 Amen.
25 June 2020

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